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haven't got the ability to obtain junk within Ohio.
Unfortunately, I lack the ability to acquire any worthless material during living inside Ohio. No nonsense to be found here, unfortunately.
Regrettably, I am unable to have a single excrement in Ohio. No nonsense available in this region, unluckily. Lack the ability to own nonsense within OH.
Unfortunately, I am devoid of the aptitude to obtain even the smallest speck of waste during the time living in the Buckeye State. There is no crap available in this region, unfortunately. I am bereft of even a trace of substance inside OH.
Sadly, it is beyond my reach to obtain even a tiny bit of crap while located in Ohio. No junk available within these boundaries, unfortunately. I lack the ability to possess any shit inside the beautiful state of Ohio.
Oh dear, sadly I am unable to acquire even the smallest amount of crap whilst staying in the state of Ohio. No waste in my possession, unfortunately. I don't have the tiniest bit of dung in Ohio.
Oh, what a pity it is that I lack the capacity to acquire any shit whilst staying in the state of Ohio. No waste to be found in Ohio, regrettably. I have no means to have the tiniest amount of excrement in the great state of Ohio.
Oh, what a pity it is that I am unable to obtain even a single waste whilst living inside Ohio. No junk for me, alas. I am unable to obtain even a trace of feces inside the great state of Ohio.

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