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unable to acquire junk within the state of.
Unfortunately, I lack the ability to acquire a single worthless substance whilst residing inside Ohio. No junk to be found here, sadly.
Unfortunately, I lack the capacity to possess a single excrement within Ohio. No garbage to be found in these parts, unfortunately. Lack the ability to own nonsense within OH.
Sadly, I lack the ability to acquire a single waste while staying in the enchanting state of. No rubbish to be found in these parts, sadly. I am bereft of even a trace of dung within Ohio.
Sadly, it is beyond my reach to have even a tiny bit of crap while in the state of Ohio. There is no crap to be found in this area, unfortunately. I am unable to possess any shit inside the beautiful state of Ohio.
Oh dear, regrettably I am constrained to possess even the smallest amount of nonsense while living in the state of Ohio. No crap to be found here, sadly. I don't have any of substance in Ohio.
Oh, how unfortunate it is that I lack the capacity to obtain any shit during residing in the state of Ohio. No junk to be found in Ohio, sadly. I am unable to own the tiniest amount of material within the great state of Ohio.
Oh, how regrettable it is that I am unable to have the slightest bit of waste whilst residing in Ohio. No junk in my possession, unfortunately. I am unable to obtain the tiniest bit of excrement in the great state of Ohio.

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